The Sophomoric andre​.​W

by andre.W

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Rejected album titles:
Christian Potato Chips, Pocketful Of Scissors, F.O.S., Dry Ice Angels, Dollnet, Pretzel Cage, Color Smacks, Poppotatoes, ¿Cuantos Ojos Tienes?

Yorkville MP8D, Magnavox CDB 260, Yamaha MB-III, Shure SM58 (x4), Pearl Export 2-piece, Paiste Cymbals, Applause cut-out, Yamaha woodwinds, (Nacho Cheese) Doritos, Dr. Pepper.

Produced by andre.W

Recorded at Glengate, Raleigh NC by andre.W, except the following:

Sit Here- Recorded by Erich Fletschinger and mixed by Jamie W. at A9 Studio, Burlington VT;
Ribbon- Recorded and mixed by Jamie W. at A9 Studio, Burlington VT; and
I Love My Kitty Cat- Recorded by andre.W at Lincoln's Beard, St. Albans VT

Written by andre.W


released November 25, 2011

andre.W- all instruments and vocals, except the following:

Neil Vanslette- rhythm guitar on Sit Here and Ribbon

Franc Panache- drums on Sherwood Barefoot

Sissy Pearl- chatter on Sizzlespace and Salt & Cinnamon, recorders

Yorkville MP8D, Magnavox CDB260, Yamaha MB-III, Shure SM58 (x4), Pearl Export 2-piece, Paiste cymbals, Applause cutout, Yamaha woodwinds

published 2009 by candyhammer music (ASCAP)




all rights reserved


andre.W Portland, Maine


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Track Name: Sit Here
Like a mortal wound or a voyage across the sea
Like a salamander or a bowl of ice cream
Like a Halloween pumpkin that hung out to dry
Like a fire hydrant in your eye

I haven't said a word to anyone
And I haven't been to town since I was young
And you've planted a seed in the deepest part of me
And I must say that being with you's fun

My juggling act could use a little work
And I keep a loaded gun in my purse
And I think it's fun to sit behind the catcher's mitt
And I'd like to join you if you're off to church

Sit and drink candy on the pier
Track Name: Super Link
I want a walkie-talkie that matches yours
To use in a boat or a tree
If I'm in Connecticutt and you're in Colorado, call for me

And all the air that separates will fill with waves
While one's at Golden Gate, the other's watching the Braves

No tightrope keeps the bike of my voice from the sight
Of your ears, nor the truck your words drive from here
As I hear, buy some beers on the way to where we are
Track Name: Sherwood Barefoot
Well, not long ago in a town this size,
Down south where the birds stay warm,
Lived a man named Sherwood,
Who handled odd jobs good and used to could
Cause kids all quite a stir throughout our neighborhood

See, Sherwood was the kind of guy
Who'd look ol' Sanity in the eye
And say "Believe you're trespassing, boy,"

Then he'd grab his rusty pellet gun
And pelt it off while all we'd run,
Right fearing he might kill us with that toy

Yes, one cold night in a town this size,
Down south where the birds stay warm,
Al Norris was taking his garbage out in a rainstorm,
And what'd he see but ol' Sherwood Barefoot

Lyin' on the ground spread eagle with his arms stretched out,
'Neath a ride mower mounted on cinder blocks,
No doubt just lookin' at how the sucker run
Or maybe just lyin' out for some ol' fun:
Sherwood often was
In a perplexing place or posture to be found

We marked our calendars every week:
One year Sherwood fancied take a car paintin' streak,
And sure as his name was Sherwood Barefoot,
Me and Al Norris saw those hub caps painted, too--

The front ones red, like the old Barefoot truck,
The rear left green, he said, for good luck,
And the right found Sherwood dippin' his last can of blue

Now I don't recall ever utterin' the words
"Amateur taxidermy" any time in life
Except when describing Sherwood Barefoot
None of them fancy raccoons or rabbits, mind you

See, Sherwood was a fishin' man too,
And the town's tour included only fairly 'fore 'twas through
A good look at the Barefoot household mantles'
Fish heads with sunglasses.

You ask anyone who knew ol' Sherwood Barefoot personal
What they remember the most about the legacy he'd tote,
And I guarantee sure as you can hear me
There's 3 things any right-minded sould would note:

1) Sherwood's moonshine business drew in some bait money when there weren't no fences or engines needed repair;

2) that amidst the regular car color changes showed sore-thumb style the Barefoot house's siding, which some unsuspecting greenhouse came to spare, and

3) most tragically-- the last lesson that old Sherwood 'forded all that ever hear the story of Sherwood Barefoot, and let seep into their souls what enrichin' buds of wisdom and charity he may leave behind, even as his kind hands reached out giving every day he lived-- at least in his own way:

Don't never make a barn collapse a one-man task
There's always gents who'd lend some muscle--
Don't be scared to ask

'Cause as we see in the times and deeds .
That Sherwood laid plain--
All the painin' and fishin' and shootin'
And brewin' and shoutin' out

Went silent on that day
Our hearts felt that Barefoot-sized pain

Sherwood grabbed his trusty sledge hammer
'Thout nary a warn
An' he toted it on his shoulder to the middle of the barn
Looked the center beam square, spat in hands,
Made a squinter...and sure enough,

Sherwood Barefoot fell quiet under a big pile of splinters.

So next time you're givin'
A new breed a' moonshine the taste test,
Drink to Sherwood, say the wods "remember the cap gun,"

And wish him the best.
Track Name: Sizzlespace
andre.W: bass, guitar, spoken, noise
Sissy Pearl: chatter

music and spoken: improvised
recorded at Glengate
Track Name: Doo Way Twitty
Corn in the butter way, shoo fly shoo, skip to my Lou
And we say Fee fi fiddley eye oh on such a winter's day

Gum in the ash tray way, shoo fly shoe...

And we say someone's in the kitchen with Nathaniel
Someone's in the kitchen with Franc
Someone's in the kitchen with Fanuel
Grabbin' at the wheel for a honk
Track Name: (I'm) So Restless (I Could Eat A Stapler)
Don't like being treated by a pre-school kid
Wanna feed them a staple sandwich
Drinking NyQuil on the phone to a homerec drone
Eat Cheez Whiz through a straw, Don't mean I'm a tart, eh?

I put midgets in the salt and pepper shakers
They play the bongos so
'Congo' scared my coffee-drinking cat so

Blowing up bubbles on the radio
Speakers made of tin
So flip it over for a barbecue radio if you feel like it

Jelly was a nit-wit twin cracker wins the bob round the dilly-o
Pickles spent oh the wary time washer tellin' Jelly played bingo
Track Name: Dentifrice
C'est tres important se brosser les dents touts les jours
Et apres TO FLOSS, que dit moi; suis le BOSS, mais, bien surs

Quand je brosse les dents, voila: je me sent meilleur
C'est tres important se brosser les dents touts les jours
Track Name: Wrinkle World Anthem
Welcome all to Wrinkle World
We just found an iron and we can't plug it in
Track Name: Coolfriendly
Elizabeth makes square cakes in a two-inch tangle pan
She pinches them and prunes them for her understanding man
She puts one on the catapult and points it toward his wall
Converts the torque to metric-- bricks are seven meters tall

Torrence takes a trolley of amoebas to the zoo
He feeds them cotton candy that he's scraped off from his shoe
And nothing makes a timid micro-organism squeal
So much as stories past of breakdowns told atop the ferris wheel

Dave has shied from socks since the union workers' strike
He's cutting boots from foil in preparing for a hike
A possum falls into his lap, its dying wish to be
Converted to an ornament hung boot-wrapped from the tree
Track Name: Ribbon
I see the woman that I love
She's standing on the carpet
She's got a flowered dress on
And she's holding a ribbon

Like shampoo to the eyes, my love brings french fries
And then I take her hand so we can walk to Japan
Track Name: The Grapes Of Venutia
Shuttle totes a Christmas tree to Venus
Where we're havin' a picnic
Take my hand when I've hopped upon
Our steel space steed

This I hope won't make you feel car sick

Jelly beans smack your eyes
With the noon tide (on New York time)
Open your mouth and it sounds like a chime

Stop on a nickel
Dessert's a space pickle
Toast a comet with two lagers and lime
Track Name: Sandles In The Syrup
Crawl my dears in caramel boots to the cocoa cove
Or you can butterscotch board

Few of the sweets are 'semi-'
Swim with a fudge duck horde

P.B. prechipitated by the sweet slate minute
Trees swing breaking your jaw
We're falling in it

Pita nugget's a hammock
Sugar dreams stream within it
Track Name: I Love My Kitty Cat
I love my kitty cat

I feed him Kit Kat from the table
I let him wear my hat when we go for a walk

He's so fun! He likes to play games in the sun
Like Monopoly-- we play it on the driveway

He's so fun that he pats my head
Even though most people pat their kitty's heads,
My kitty pats my head

Instead of making him eat a rat,
We make friends with the rat and let him join
We're playing board games in the summer time

Feed him chocolate at the table
Beat him at Monopoly whenever I'm able
Know we're gonna grow old together
I love my kitty cat